May 23, 2012

Pride? Check!

About this time last year I was in the throes of a blogging challenge I had set for myself.  I was actually doing pretty well keeping up with the "blog every day" thing and it was fun.  I would link most posts to Facebook because that's the only way close friends and family would see it.  I never had any delusions of grandeur......I knew it was some silly stories and random thoughts put out there that few would love.

I was good with that.

Then I was told that linking my blog to Facebook was "self-promoting".  That stung a bit but I was glad for the pride check.  I had to make sure I wasn't doing it for any selfish gain and just to make it easier for family and friends to access stuff I wrote about our life.  

And besides, isn't the whole premise behind Facebook self-promoting?  Just sayin'.......

The year went on.  I blogged.....I didn't blog.  

But I did Facebook....a lot.  It was an easy way to avoid things I needed to do, an easy way to keep up with what everyone and their kids and dogs and cats and grandparents were doing.  It made me feel connected.  

That is, until I realized that reading Facebook could actually alter my mood.  I would be happy, mad, jealous, disgusted, excited, insecure.

Really?  How lame is that?  Could I seriously not just take 5 minutes to read about what everyone is doing without wanting to yell at my teen for not being a perfect athlete, student and muscisian? Or discontent with my husband because he hasn't bought me a boat?  Or down on myself for being incredibly underachieving?  

These are clearly my issues and I'm certainly not faulting anyone for having perfect kids, boats, and achievements.  I'm not.

I just didn't think I was vulnerable enough to react like I did.

This year's pride check?  Epic Fail

I did what any overreacting, hormonal woman would do.  I threw out a cryptic Facebook message about taking time off and then disconnected my account.  Like I thought there would be great wailing and gnashing of teeth if I was absent for a week or two until I could get my act together.  

Then I started to worry that friends would think I had defriended them.  Oh the horrors!  We couldn't have that!  

So I reactivated my account.  

I clearly have issues.

Needless to say, I practiced the long lost art of self-control and didn't look at a single status update yesterday or today.  I got a ton done and can 100% blame all mood swings on my children.

Except they cleaned the kitchen for me tonight when I had to go to a meeting and I must share this note that I found when I got home.


Ok, so I won't be bragging about any spelling awards and his handwriting is clearly indicative of his future as a doctor, but how adorable that the child does know how to write a good salutation!


Makes you jealous, right?  Heehee

2 comments:

  1. So cute about the note... and I totally agree about FB... good and bad... but I do believe that God has allowed these media challenges to exist to remind us to keep our eyes on HIM in all that we do... not that one is better than the other (to have a FB account or not) but to keep HIM the focus... miss you friend...

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  2. Dear Keri,

    I love your blogs...as they often present a mirror to me, in an impacting, convicting, but non-threatening or condeming way. You really have a gift of expressing that touches lives and hearts. Helps me to take a deeper look at myself.

    As for Facebook, personally, I didn't miss you there...but that has nothing to do with you, only with my limited facebook engagement. I think of those who have 4 hundred thousand "friends"...some of whom they do not know or some who will not even speak to them. Sort of deceptive, or distorted at best. And though it is sometimes the only way I know what my grandchildren or children are doing, I rarely care what others are eating for dinner or watching on TV! (ie...DEEP communication!)

    Thank you for sharing life. As Beth Moore shares, there is a gap between our "theology" and our "reality" and you help me to realize my gaps as I deeply desire a merging of my faith and my actions.

    I love and appreciate you. Hope we get to see you this summer! Suz

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