May 07, 2012

Being Choosy

Someday my boys will pledge their eternal love to a young lady and will walk into the sunset with her to begin a new life.

Excuse me while I throw up a little in my mouth.

I joke (cry) with friends about the day I will be at the mercy of a daughter-in-law.  What probably makes me the most nervous is that I have not been the most stellar of daughter-in-laws myself.  I know first hand how obnoxious they (I) can be.  

That is why I would like to say that I am totally in favor of arranged marriages.  I'll choose a friend I adore who has a daughter I've watched grow up and BAM!  A marriage made in heaven.  I will inform my boys of my choice and despite cries of protest I will create a world in which no other option will be as appealing as the one I have made for them.

All will be perfect until one day my boy wakes up next to the love I chose for him and realizes it is not a love he chose for himself.  Despite my threats and protests and tears, he will set out to find love for himself.  

Will he return to her?  Will he choose wisely?  Will I even get to be a part of the journey or have I lost my chance to influence?

I sometimes wonder if I am not doing the same in their relationship with God.  They have grown up in a house where they are told what to believe and why.  They are taken to church and surrounded by people who believe the same.

We fight and sometimes lose to the temptation to put them in a bubble where they don't experience "the world".  We choose friends, we shelter and protect because we think if given the choice, they might not love the Person we want them so badly to love.

One day they might realize that the God we've told them to love.....they don't really love at all.

Will he return to Him?  Will he choose wisely?  Will I even get to be a part of the journey or have I lost my chance to influence?

My job is to share and teach as much as I can about having a relationship with a woman.

Treat her with respect.  Choose a woman who doesn't seek attention from others with the way she dresses.  Stay away from a gossip.  Look for kindness and patience.  Make her a priority.  Spoil her.  Treat her well.  Love her.

Make sure she wants to share the grandbabies with her mother-in-law.

My job is to do the same with their relationship with Christ.

Trust Him.  Live a life worthy of His sacrifice.  Talk to Him and let Him talk back.  Seek His will.  Ask for wisdom.  Learn His word.  Worship Him.  Cry to Him.  Love Him.

The best kind of love is love where you know out of all the options in the world, you were chosen.

My job is not to choose for them.

I want my boys to choose her.

I want my boys to choose Him.


  1. Keri, your words are so inspiring, encouraging and just plain lovely!!! So ready for you to be here for the summer!


    1. I can't wait to get there!! Looking forward to some face time with you!!

  2. You know I loved this! In Life Group last night we were talking about Deut. 6 where they are instructed, when asked about God, to tell them of the redemption...of their redemption. I thought to myself how ofter I tell the boys they are going to church because I said so instead of telling them why I want to go to church. Telling them what Christ has done for me. I must choose to focus on that more.

    1. I have so many friends that want to shield their kids from everything in the world and I have to wonder what good that ultimately does in a child's journey of faith. We have to equip them and teach them and watch them navigate through tough stuff and I most definitely want them to do the navigating while they still live under my roof so I can pray them through it. It's tough.....

  3. Anytime I'm tempted to question God for not giving me at least one boy, I fast-forward to the daughter-in-law thing. :)




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