You know all those times you swear off sugar or reality TV and before you know it you are eating an enormous bowl of ice cream while watching The Biggest Loser?
The last time I posted it was a declaration of intent to move on from my personal blog. That actually lasted more than 7 months which is a heck of a lot longer than any of the 893 times I've sworn off sugar.
The reality is that I miss this. I didn't think I would, but I do. I miss being able to document what is happening in our world. I miss how cathartic it is to fight with a keyboard to make sense of the noisy jumbled mess of thoughts in my head.
As for the project I was moving on to devote myself to? I'm at a loss for how to proceed with it. My fear of failing has given way to a whimpering acceptance that maybe I wasn't cut out to be the person that could accomplish turning a fantastic vision into reality. Shortcomings are always so hard to swallow.
So here I am. Back in a space that feels familiar and inviting.
Right this moment I am nestled into my favorite corner position on our couch. Our Christmas tree sparkles with lights and ornaments that hold zero sentimental meaning. I must admit I miss hanging up ornaments that catapult me back in time to when glue and construction paper were staples in our house and I could trace a little boy's hand and it was still cute.
At this point, that hand would be traced and then take up half the tree to display.
Today my firstborn turns 15 and only a few weeks ago my baby turned 13. How in the world did that happen so quickly? Life is short and so incredibly unpredictable. I feel like there are pivotal chapters in my family's story that are being written right this moment and I don't want to forget a single sentence.
I have no idea how I'm supposed to wrap up a post such as this. Nothing inspiring or even interesting.....just me on the other side of finishing up a big 'ol piece of humble pie.
I think it's time to move on!