I just handed Garrett over to a surgeon, an anesthesiologist, and some nurses. It all happened much more quickly than I had anticipated because the doctor was running early. When does that happen??
I made significant eye contact with every surgeon and nurse that will have their hands on him. Staring everyone down so that my face is seared in their brain as they make that first incision.
This is my baby boy, who is clearly not a baby anymore, but as long as I live he will always be my baby boy. He is funny and quirky and happy-go-lucky. He loves his family and is happiest with a homemade meal and a table that isn't missing a single one of his people.
He loves Jesus and believes that God answers prayer. He isn't perfect but he loves without prejudice. He likes to know stuff.....stuff no one else cares about. He is amazing with little kids. He wants to see the Rangers win the World Series.
He wants to see more of this world, he wants to learn how to drive, he wants to be a better guitarist. He wants to grow up and get married and have kids of his own. He wants to see the new Spiderman movie and play his new xBox game.
This patient on your gurney is my son. My sweet boy. Be alert, do your job well. Take out what doesn't belong and return him to me whole....he has a big life yet to live.
Somehow I don't think they got all of that in my one simple stare down. I think they got more of a "crazy mom" vibe.
My prayers for today:
The surgery involves them cutting his ear and pulling it forward to get behind the bone where the inner ear bones are. He lost two of those bones in the last surgery and they were replaced with titanium. This tumor has grown over the titanium so they have to take it out and clean it and then replace it. My prayer is that he doesn't lose the third inner ear bone and that the titanium is replaced correctly so he doesn't lose any more of his hearing.
I am praying protection all around the facial nerve that runs so close to where the surgery is happening.
I am praying the doctor is 100% focused on what he's doing.
I am praying that Garrett doesn't have any reaction to the anesthesia and recovers quickly.
I am praying for a lot of things but those are the biggies right now.
And then there's my imagination where I envision all the doctors having a fight or discussing a love triangle just before something goes wrong and that's when I realize that I shouldn't base all my medical assumptions on what I've seen on Gray's Anatomy.