August 17, 2010

The Honeymooners

You are in the honeymoon phase!

A phrase I have been on the receiving end of a dozen times in the last week. When I respond to a question about how I'm doing with a positive response, I get THE look followed quickly by THAT phrase and a rushed "but you will like it eventually" type statement thrown on at the end to make it all better.

Why is it that we can't let those in a state of euphoria stay that way? We are quick to tell a newly married couple about the troubles they will face in the future. We share horror stories of labor and delivery to a sweet woman glowing with excitement for a new baby. We tell women with infants about how hard it is to have a 2 year old, we tell moms with 2 year olds how hard it is to have elementary aged kids and we tell moms of 3rd graders that their life will soon be tormented with teenagers. We tell young women to enjoy their youth before "real life" sets in and we tell women in their 20's to enjoy having all their body parts in the proper place because it won't be long until everything starts sliding south.

Is it that difficult for us to let someone live with an innocence that comes from not knowing what lies ahead? Do we begrudge their happiness because it was once robbed from us?

I understand that in the interest of reality people are just trying to prepare me for the inevitable. That the charm and excitement of a new life will wear thin and reality will set in.

I get that.

I have been purposely enjoying each and every day that I'm happy, refusing to sit in dread of the days I won't be. That is how you miss stuff. Plain and simple.

You miss the joys of being a newlywed when you dread your first fight over money. You miss the joys of being pregnant when you've heard the stories of 37 hours of labor. You miss your kid's childhood when you live with trepidation of what the next stage in their lives will bring. You miss the excitement of living somewhere new and exciting if you are just waiting for the day the honeymoon will come to an end.

I vote that the wiser and more experienced person allow ignorance to reign. As they say:

Ignorance is bliss!


  1. I will never share my 11 pound baby story again :) Love you and love this way of thinking! I get told A LOT that Kyleigh will change when she enters high scholl...UGH bugs me!

  2. I have purposed to never offer advise unless it is asked for from now on. I hate it when people burst my blissfully ignorant bubble...I have enough of an overactive imagination to freak myself out about the future without someone else doing it for me. I don't want to be one of those people....thank you for putting it into words, Keri.

  3. May your Singaporean honeymoon never, ever, ever end!!

    And I hope and pray you can find a way to get Radical in the next couple weeks! I would love, love, love, LOVE to have you join us!!

  4. WOW....that was awesome. The wow is not because YOU wrote an awesome, but becasue it was AWESOME! You are so right! Maybe, sometimes, we should just let people choose to be happy instead of kicking reality in for them! Very well said!



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